How Many Warning Signs Do You Need To Listen?

How many warning signs do you need before you shift directions? I shared with you all in my last newsletter that I have been on the brink of shutdown this year. Like if life took one more turn in the wrong direction I was going to lose my shit. Rightfully so. The fear of collapse, the weight of holding grief and transition with no answer for what's the best next move, You can get so caught waiting for a signal that you drown out your sense of faith with the noise of doubt.

My faith had been at all time low. I was trying to work the circumstances with logic. all logic. No faith. Faith felt far fetched in the sense that I had no control over the outcome and control over the outcome is the only thing that I desired. I wanted to define what was next myself. I didn't want anyone else telling me what was possible, not even spirit. I was locked into a headspace where I was taking on the risk of pushing beyond my limits.

I kept telling everyone around me my husband, my friends, hell even my therapist:

"I keep getting this feeling that spirit is asking me to sit down, to stop, to shift even before there is another pathway or direction clearly defined."

I'd said that so many times when I finally hit my third roadblock everybody around me was looking at me like:

don't even say it. do something. now.

The tears started flowing. How was I going to figure everything out if I stopped now with no plan? How was I going to get ahead if I stopped now? Was I just being lazy not being willing to keep pushing through my current circumstances?These were all the thoughts swirling through my mind.

And worst of all...

What if the "signs" that I saw/felt weren't actually "signs" at all?

Maybe I was really out here alone and doing it on my own.

Maybe the uncertainty was an indicator that I had already failed.

The terror that uncertainty, shame and guilt create in our body and minds is unmatched and it cannot be ignored.

You can feel that internal gut pull telling you clearly: something is wrong, we need to shift.

And the pull to figure it out on your own and not surrender becomes greater because control, certainty and stress are fuel right now to move from point a to point b.

And letting go of those fuel points mean surrender, which inevitably makes us feel powerless in the ways that we originally felt a deep sense of comfort in knowing what our efforts would produce.

There is a place within letting go where we have to fully stretch out our arms and legs and surrender. No grasping. No clenching. No holding on tight. A true trust fall into the arms of the universe because not doing so will cause more detriment.

So I stopped.

I stopped working my plan.

I stopped trying to be in the way.

I stopped trying to have all the control.

I stopped trying to be perfect.

I stopped blaming myself and I let go.

The shift I felt in my body just days after deciding I couldn't keep going in the same fashion was unbelievable. I realized how tightly I was wound up trying to make it all work on my own.

As you go into this week I want you to think about :

Where you can make a little more space for spirit to step into your circumstances?

Where can you allow the universe to take care of you more than you've allowed before?

Where can you identify where you are holding and tensing up out of fear of uncertainty and not wanting things to go wrong.

Where have you been ignoring or pushing past the warning signs?

When it feels impossible to slow down, that's when we need to slow down the most. I want you to take a few minutes to calm your spirit, your body and your nervous system this week. I know it may feel unreasonable with everything you have on your plate but I promise you on the other side of you taking even just five minutes of time, there is relief available to you.

This week's movement assignment:

​Messy Movement Practice: Intuitive Listening ​

​Messy Movement Practice: Accepting Loss ​

Click each practice to take a dive in and join us in The Messy Movement Membership.

Questions? Hit reply to this email and happy to support.

See you on the dance floor,

Temptress